Why Yoga?I have always had an issue with my left knee since injuring it as a teenager in a pretty stupid accident. In Nov. 2011, it started acting up again. This time, I was out on light duty for almost two months. I probably would've been on light duty for another couple of months, but I refused to accept it. I absolutely hated the fact that my body was not healing itself and my mind refused to give it anymore time to heal. I went back to full duty work, which involves 10 miles of walking per day, while working through the pain.
I started yoga with my initial intention of getting my knee stronger not knowing that it would be the first step of this incredible journey. Not only is there no more pain, but I feel this incredible peace for the first time ever in my life. However, the mind, ever clever, sneaks in and sets doubts. Doubts that I wasn't bendy enough; that I had no clue what I was doing; that I had no right to be there.
In the past, I would've listened. I would've survived a class and got out of there so fast without ever going back. I would've gone back home to lick my wounds and beat myself up some more. I almost did one time until I talked to one of my friends who has been practicing of years.
Her answer was that everyone has their own challenges. Everyone works towards their own goals at their own pace. No one begins perfect, everyone works to accomplish what they want.
With that being said, I started to see what I could do to challenge myself and myself only. Challenging my mind to be still and challenging myself to keep it still.
My mind tells me that I'm not bendy enough. I tell it that I will get there someday, I don't know when, but at least I'm doing something constructive to change it.
My mind tells me that I had no clue on what I'm doing. I tell it that I sure don't. At least I am willing to learn and to accept a good challenge.
My mind tells me that I had no right to be there. I tell it, who are you to tell on where I can and can't be?
Not only am I not meekly accepting the criticism, I am able to silence them. Able to speak up and stand up for myself. To gain that confidence to challenge the authority that my mind has over me and to keep it silent for the hour and half that I'm in practice. The inner battle gets easier and easier every time.
I would've never known that if I never had the courage to take that first step and if I didn't have the faith to keep on walking.
A simple wish to strength my physical body has transformed itself into a improvement of my spiritual body.